I woke up earlier than usual this morning; just lay there underneath the covers. Just above me the chill of the air was floating: I could feel it brushing past my cheek. I realize the power has gone off. ugh. But I get up, even though I have no classes till 3:00 pm. As I stretch my arms, goosebumps ripple over my chest, my shoulders and arms, my legs.
This is the first time I drive with the windows rolled up, it seems the a/c was broken all this time, and the fresh air running by my face helped cool me off. Not today. Even the birds seem sluggish, chirping out of tune as I walk up to my car. Oh well. I look forward to sitting in the comfy warm of the Uministry at the university.
And yet, after plenty of minutes of sitting down at the Uministry tables, listening to some ambient ooh-eeeh-ooh on my computer, Frank calls me in to his office. I've been going to the Uministry since two weeks into the fall semester. Laughing with my classmates, interacting with them, making friends. And yet, even for my particular viewpoints, I thought I had a lot of friends at the umin.
I was wrong. Not too wrong, though. I'm sure they meant the best of intentions, but the kinds of friends that don't have guts; the guts to tell a guy when he's doing something upsetting. It kind of hurts. It stings just right under my chin when Frank tells me to just tone it down a bit, to maybe take a break from this place. And couldn't I do something else for a while?
Yeah, sure frank. Damn, I'm the kind of guy that is 100% dense. I'm loud and passionate, I guess, maybe a bit too much. Yeah, I'll take it easy for a while.
I leave his office and hoist my bookbag onto my shoulder. For the past semester, I've been walking everywhere around campus, and St. Mary's isn't a big school, but the exercise has produced some stretch marks around my chest. It hasn't helped my gut, but my gut isn't that big, so I'm not worried. I guess It's been some time since I've walked across campus. It seems they don't want me here. So I apologized to Rebecca and left.
What to do now, I wonder? Fishing my cell phone out of my pocket, I cursed a bit; it had been on the web browser, the piece of trash. My cell phone bill's gonna go up. It was 12:31, and still I have no class.
Sarah showed up today, though, unusually early for when we get together, which is about 1:00 or so. It was nice, sitting in the back of the University Center with her. We talked, and we always have the most interesting conversations, like about how solitary guys make interesting partners(solitary girls, in my case). Discussed past loves, and relationships and how she needs to meet more girlfriends.(the friendly kind) Hmm... Maybe I need to get a girlfriend. Forget it, I need to talk about more manly things. Except in this case, "manly" pertains to abstract philosophical treatises and computer programming. Not many men know of such things. But geeks--know plenty.
Talking, talking, there's plenty everwhere. But the call to action remains void. Strange... that reads like a good thing.